Jets Scrimmage at Hofstra University

NYJets.com- The New York Jets officially open their 2009 training camp with two practices on July 31 at SUNY Cortland and announced details of a training camp schedule that feature practices open to the public in three different locations - Central New York, Long Island and New Jersey. On Aug. 12, the team will hold a special Family Night Practice brought to you by Verizon FiOS on Long Island at Hofstra University’s James M. Shuart Stadium.

Hofstra University was the home of the Jets training facility and training camp from 1968 until the team moved into its new facility in September 2008. At the conclusion of this special practice, the entire team will head to the sidelines to sign autographs for fans. Three more practices will be open to the public on Aug. 22, 26 and 27 at the Atlantic Health Jets Training Center in Florham Park, N.J. At each location, fans attending can enjoy Generation Jets Fest and the Jets Shop Merchandise Tent.

Not a bad way to spend a dreary Long Island evening. Besides, Hector--my meth dealer-- just got pinched and is doing 10-20 on Rikers. To get back on track..I'm not a Jets fan. But I don't hate the Jets. I pity the Jets (at this point, you should get that I'm a Pats fan). And their fans. The only thing worse than a second-rate franchise are the fans of that second-rate franchise (this goes for you too Mets fans). The Jets aren't even the best team in the city of New York--Buffalo could be better than them this year!

Despite my distaste for the Gang Green and , all I wanted was to give rookie QB Mark Sanchez a tiny interview. I had spent hours preparing and carefully constructing my questions. I knew exactly how to get under his skin.

• Do you think you will ever be better than Brett Favre?
• Can you handle the media coverage like Brett Favre did?
• What'd you think of Brett Favre unretiring again?
• Are you interested in do Wrangler commercials now that Brett Favre won't being them?

You can see where I was trying to go with my line of questioning. However, I never got the chance to ask him because that pretty boy piece of shit was too busy being hounded by deranged homoerotic males shrieking over Number 6's jockstrap. I mean who do these guys think Sanchez is anyway, Tom Brady? I mean c'mon! Even Giants fans fall in love with Brady's baby blues!

So since I couldn't get the proper interview I did get some good footage of their scrimmage. Don't worry Jets fans, I already shipped the video out to Foxborough. It'll be in Belichick's hands by Thursday morning. That's what you get for screwing over the Improper Sportsonian!